Friday Frills

I feared being alone, until I learned to like my own company.

I feared failure, until I realized it was a means to success.

I feared the opinions of others, until I realized people will have opinions about me anyway.

I feared rejection, until I learned to have faith in myself.

I feared pain, until I realized it was necessary for growth.

I feared ridicule, until I learned how to laugh at myself.

I feared the truth, until I saw the ugliness in lies.

I feared getting older, until I realized I gained more wisdom with each passing day.

I feared life, until I experienced its beauty.

I feared hate, until I realized that it was nothing more than ignorance.

I feared love, until it touched my heart and uplifted my soul.

I feared the dark, until I saw the beauty of the stars.

I feared the light, until I learned that the truth would give me strength.

I feared the future, until I realized that it's a path to new discoveries.

I feared the past, until I realized that it has moulded me into who I am today.

I feared my destiny, until I realized I had the power to change my life.

I feared change, until I realized that even the most beautiful butterfly had to undergo metamorphosis before it could fly.

Author Unknown, modified by me.

Friday Frills

Life has taught us that...

You can't be all things to all people.

You can't do all things at once.

You can't do all things equally well.

And you can't do all things better than everyone else.



So, you have to find out who you are, and be that.

You have to decide what comes first in your life, and do that.

You have to discover your strengths, and use them.

You have to learn not to compete with others, 

Because no one else is in the contest of 'Being You'.

Then you will have learned to accept your own uniqueness.

You will have learned to set priorities and make decisions.

You will have learned to live with your limitations.

You will have learned to give yourself the respect that is due.



Dare To Believe that you are a wonderful, unique person.

That you are a once-in-all-history event.

That it's more than a right, it's your duty, to be who you are.

That life is not a problem to solve, but a gift to cherish.

Unknown, modified by me.

Beat The Monday Blues

It's that time of the new year when we're all coming off our holiday highs, and easing back into the throes of reality. Most of us will be returning to school or work, perhaps even both. After a fun festive season, I find it difficult to shake off the vacation vibe and get back into the groove of things. I've thought up a few ideas to take the dullness out of everyday routines and make the transition back to normality a smooth one. So grab a brush and paint over those Monday blues with a shade of sunshine :)

How To Beat Out the Monday Blues





* Start your day with something that relaxes you, especially if you know the chaos that lies ahead. An undisturbed cup of coffee or tea while watching the morning news, try a hot shower with an invigorating shower gel, write in your journal, watch the sunrise, have a hearty breakfast, meditation or yoga, or even just lying in bed for an extra ten minutes.

* Change something in your surroundings. Coming back from holiday to a place that looks the same can be a little depressing. Rearrange the furniture in your home, bring a new vase or frame to work, brighten up your living space with a new coat of paint. I find that making your workspace more attractive takes away some of the tedium.

* Organize your handbag. Sounds simple, but after the festive season, it can become a bottomless pit of unidentifiable junk. Empty out the contents, edit out anything that's unnecessary, and put things in an order that will be easy to find. You will feel a whole lot lighter, literally.

* Wear a bold shade of lipstick. There's nothing like the right shade of red (or pink) that will immediately boost confidence and morale. And get you a few smiles too.

* This is also a good time to start a creative project. Gather all your holiday snapshots and scrapbook them into something beautiful that will be a reminder of the great time you had.

* Getting into a kitchen routine after endless days and nights of eating out can be grueling. To make it more bearable, start by whipping up your ultimate favourite dish and really make dinner an event. No lounging around in PJ's in front of the TV with a pizza box. Proper plates and cutlery, a nice outfit, decorative table setting or flowers, and relish in that time with your family/significant other. Or by yourself, remember that scene in Eat Pray Love when Liz Gilbert made a gourmet meal just for herself in her apartment in Rome?

* Exercise = endorphins. As unappealing as it may sound, even five minutes of high-impact exercise will have a beneficial effect. But make it fun. Turn up your stereo and dance around, skip rope, hula hoop, jump on a mini trampoline, take the stairs instead of the elevator, or park furthest from your work/campus entrance (I call this 'unconscious' exercise).

* Treat yourself to something decadent. If you don't have time to make anything, go out and get a treat from your local deli. Even just one cupcake can make the world of difference at the end of a hard, long day.

* Make an inspiration board. Collect pictures of all the things you'd like to achieve as well as things you've already achieved. Paste them onto a board on the wall. This will remind you of how well you've done in the past and inspire you to reach your goals in the future.

* Take half an hour out of the day just for You. If you don't have that amount of time to spare, even 15 minutes will do. Do something you love: read a chapter of that novel, browse a magazine, take a power nap or relaxing bath, watch your favourite comedy, take a photograph of something beautiful, or call up and chat to an old friend.





If you're feeling a deeper shade of blue this Monday, I hope that you will try out one of these tips or share some of your own with me. If all fails, catching up with your favourite blogs is a sure-fire way of cheering up. Works for me :)





*Pictures found via Tumblr, Google Images and Flickr. 

Resolutionize 2012

I'm not good at New Years Resolutions. I find myself setting up goals that are far out of reach, beyond the realms of possibility. So this year, I decided to simplify things a bit, and make a list that's sensible enough to stick to...for all twelve months of 2012.

*P.S   Check out the travel guest post I did on the lovely Vanisha's blog here. 

Friday Frills

There comes a time in your life when you have to walk away from all the drama, and the people who create it. 

Surround yourself with people who make you smile. 

Remind yourself of who you are and where you want to be.

Stand up for what you believe in, even if it means standing alone.

Forget the bad and focus on the good.

Love the people who treat you right, forgive the ones who don't. 

If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it.

Because in the end, we will only regret those chances we didn't take, relationships we were afraid to have and decisions we waited too long to make.

Life is too short to be anything but happy. 

Hold on to the memories, let go of the regrets.

Falling down is part of life, but getting back up is living.

The Best Advice Ever Received

Some Good Advice

From the Friendship Files



We're constantly getting advice from the people around us, regarding different things. But there'll always be one special piece of advice that we treasure above all the rest. Heartfelt words that someone has said to us which struck a note, inspired a dream or changed our lives for the better. Today, my friends and I share the best advice we've ever been given. 

What Is The Best Advice You've Ever Received?



*When ever I'm afraid to try something new, my best friend always says to me, "You have nothing to lose. Nothing ventured, nothing gained."

*Some opportunities only come around once, seize them so as to avoid a life of regret.

*Don't walk away from negative people - RUN!

*"No one can diminish you but yourself". A friend said this to me and it's my favourite advice.

*Forget all the negative comments people give you. Cherish the compliments.

*You're not always going to be the skinniest, smartest or prettiest girl in the room. But don't let that intimidate you. Take the best of what you have and learn to work with it.

*Chocolate is the cure to everything!

*Don't try so hard to fit in. Your differences make you stand out. How will you make your mark in the world if you're exactly like everyone else.

*My mother said to me, "Remember that one day may be hard but the next day gets better.' Those words have carried me through the toughest moments in my life. 

*Don't lose hope if you fail at something. Next time, just have more faith and work harder. But most importantly, make sure that there is a 'next time'.

*Listen to your parents, they always know best. (This was said to me by my parents, naturally).

*A lecturer once said to us in class, "Don't ever be afraid to ask questions. If you don't ask, you will never know. A curious mind is the key to a better education."

*If the shoe fits, buy two pairs!

*I was told: sometimes in difficult times or tasks you have moments when you think you can't do this, it's too much. Just hang on, those moments will pass and you will look back from a better place & think - lucky I didn't give up because its all ok now & so worth it...and it will be.

*Be thankful for all that you have because there's always someone out there who has less than you and who will give anything to be in your shoes.

*I've realised in life, that nothing worth anything is easy to come by...nothing. You have to work at it or for it.

*Don't sit around and wait for something great to happen to you. Get off that couch and make it happen yourself.

*Don't change for anyone, if they can't accept you for who you are then they certainly don't deserve you.

*The most important asset a girl has is her reputation. Its like having a flawless complexion - once its scarred it will always be there every time you look in the mirror.

*Be true to yourself, only then will you enjoy life.

*A work colleague told me, "Your career isn't everything. Make time for your family, friends & self. Because at the end of the day, if things get tough, who's more likely to be there for you?"

*Live each day like it was your last.

*If you don't believe in yourself no one else will, so stop feeling sorry for yourself, dream big and you will achieve much.

*Never judge others because you don't know when you will be in their shoes.

*Leave the past where it is...in the past.

*The best advice I've ever received is from my friend, who told me, "Don't cut yourself short. If you don't have respect and appreciation for yourself, no one else will."

*"Everything you get out of life is what you've settled for." This taught me to not to settle for less than I deserve.





Thanks to all my friends for passing on their favourite bits of advice to us. 

Dear Lovely Reader, I would love for you to also share the best advice you've ever received.

Friday Frills

Maybe...the biggest challenge in life is to be yourself in a world that is trying to make you like everyone else.

Maybe...you shouldn't hate the people who are jealous of you, but instead respect their jealousy - after all, they are the ones who think that you are better than them.

Maybe...the brightest future will always be based on a forgotten past. After all, you can’t go on successfully in life until you let go of your past mistakes, failures and heartaches.

Maybe...it's not where you are in life, but who you have by your side that really counts.

Maybe...you shouldn’t go for looks; they can deceive. Don’t go for wealth, even that fades away. Go for someone who makes you smile, because all it takes is a smile to light up the darkest day.

Maybe...you shouldn't let what you can't do interfere with what you can.

Maybe...when life is good, we should say thank you and appreciate it. And when life is grim, we should say thank you and learn from it.

Maybe...everything is beautiful, but being beautiful isn't everything.

Maybe...you shouldn't change your looks or lifestyle to please someone else, because if they truly love you, they will accept you just the way you are.

Maybe...being happy doesn't mean that everything has to be perfect. It just means that you have decided to look beyond the imperfections.

*Image found via Tumblr

Friday Frills

Friday Frills

I Believe...

We don't have to change friends, if we understand that friends change.



I Believe...

You can keep going long after you think you can't.



I Believe...

You can either run your life, or let it run you.



I Believe...

Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are

responsible for who we become.



I Believe...

Two people can look at the same thing and see something completely different.



I Believe...

It isn't enough to for others to believe in you, you have to believe in yourself too.



I Believe...

Money does not buy happiness, neither does it buy class.



I Believe...

You can't control what happens to you, but you can control your reaction to it.



I Believe...

You should always leave loved one with loving words, it may be the last time you see them.



I Believe...

Pretending to be happy doesn't make you happy.



I Believe...

Saying the words are easier than carrying out the action.



I Believe...

Nothing or no one is perfect, everything has it's flaws.



I Believe...

That it doesn't matter what you have, it's what you do with it that counts.



I Believe...

Mistakes are made so that lessons can be learnt.



I Believe...

That you shouldn't make someone a priority in your life, when you're only an option in theirs.



I Believe...

Each person that comes into your life has a specific reason for being there.



I Believe...

True beauty comes from within.



I Believe...

That which does not kill you, only makes you stronger...wiser...better.

Friday Frills

Best selling author Regina Brett became an internet sensation when she wrote a list of 45 lessons life had taught her. Ten years on and these lessons continue to light up inboxes around the world. Here are a few that have inspired me.



1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

4. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

5. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.

6. Get rid of anything that isn't beautiful, useful or joyful.

7. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.

8. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.

9. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.

10. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.

11. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

12. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

13. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

14. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

15. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.



Wishing you a lovely long weekend,

Filled with stacks of chocolate Easter eggs!

Wise Words

by George Carlin

The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees, but less sense. More knowledge, but less judgment. More experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.

We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. 

We talk too much, love too seldom and hate too often.

We've learnt how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life, not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbour. We've conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.

We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we communicate less and less.

These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships. These are the days of fancier houses, but broken homes. These are the days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway mortality, overweight bodies and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete.

Remember,

Spend some more time with your loved ones, they are not going to be around forever.

Say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.

Give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with all your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.

No one is in charge of your own happiness, except you.

Images from Weheartit

Letting Go

To let go does not mean to stop caring, it means I can’t do it for someone else.

To let go is not to cut myself off, it’s the realization I can’t control another.

To let go is not to enable, but to allow learning from natural consequences.

To let go is to admit powerlessness, which means the outcome is not in my hands.

To let go is not to try to change or blame another, it is to make the most of myself.

To let go is not to care for, but to care about.

To let go is not to fix, but to be supportive.

To let go is not to judge, but to allow another to be a human being.

To let go is not to be in the middle arranging all the outcomes, but to allow others to affect their own destinies.

To let go is not to be protective, it is to permit another to face reality.

To let go is not to deny, but to accept.

To let go is not to nag, scold or argue, but instead to search out my own shortcomings and correct them.

To let go is not to adjust everything to my desires, but to take each day as it comes and cherish myself in it.

To let go is not to regret the past, but to grow and live for the future.

To let go is to fear less and love more.

Friday Frills

Friday Frills

Resolutionize

It is that time of year where we complete Chapter 12 of 2010, and begin afresh with 2011, eager to fill the blank pages with rediscovered dreams, new hopes and fervent aspirations. It is also a time when we reflect upon the year that has passed, willing to right the wrongs and change our lives for the better. This is when New Year Resolutions are formed, where people make (sometimes impossible) pledges of self-improvement and commit to accomplish (often unreachable) goals. 

I don't do New Year's Resolutions. Simply because it's pretty hard to stick to. It's no wonder people make the exact same resolutions at the beginning of every single year. January goes as well as planned, you're still motivated in February, March is when you begin to slip, you start to neglect them in April and May is when you wonder why you made such unrealistic resolutions in the first place. You completely forget about it for the rest of year, until December, when you pledge that you will fulfill all those unresolved resolutions that you couldn’t attain within the year. It's a vicious circle. 

These are some of the most popular new year resolutions that people make: 

• Lose Weight and exercise more 


• Quite smoking 


• Get out of debt and save money 


• Find a better job 


• Improve on their education 


• Go away on a long holiday


• Find their soulmate 


• Volunteer to help others 


• Buy a house or move to a better place 


• Become more organised and less stressed 

I bet that 3 or more of these were on your list for 2011. Instead, why don't you try some of these funny new year resolutions that I stumbled upon: 

• I will no longer waste my time reliving the past, instead I will spend it worrying about the future. 
 


• I will not bore my boss with the same excuse for taking leave. I will think up other innovative excuses. 

 


• I will not spend every weekend in my PJ's, lazying in the living room. I will move the TV to my bedroom instead. 


• I will give up chocolates totally. Completely. Honestly...Ok maybe just the white ones. 


• I will stop sending e-mails, BBM's, SMS's and be on the phone at the same time with the same person. 
 


• I will not bribe any more traffic cops, but only because I need the money for petrol. I'll try to drive closer to the speed limit. 


• I will learn to make decisions... 


• I will cut my hair. I will grow my hair. Okay, maybe just a trim? 


• I will stop worrying about things that don't worry about me. 


• I will keep my opinions to myself. Yeah right.

Here are some resolutions that anyone would be tempted to keep: 

• I will aim for the world record for number of hours spent watching TV.


• I will read something other than the newspaper. Like fashion magazines.


• I will chat more over phone. 


• I will get more credit cards and max them out shopping. 


• I will gain 15kg. Putting on weight is much easier and more fun than losing it. 


• I will stop exercising, because it's such a waste of time. 


• I will procrastinate more. Think I'll start sometime next year. 


• I will spend less time at work. 


• I will eat more junk food.


• I will take up a new habit. Maybe smoking, it helps keep tobacco workers employed. 

Wouldn't it be easy to keep these resolutions for more than a week?

Okay, onto the serious stuff...My New Year gift to you is the wise and wonderful words of Everybody's Free to Wear Sunscreen (which I modified slightly). It's a timeless and insightful piece of modern poetry which will alter your view of life in some way or the other. 

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of 2010, 

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas, the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience…I will dispense this advice now. 

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked…. 

You are not as fat as you imagine. 

Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday. 

Do one thing everyday that scares you. 

Sing 

Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours. 

Floss 

Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself. Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements. 

Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. 

Stretch 

Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t. 

Get plenty of calcium.

Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…What ever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. 

Enjoy your body, use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own. 

Dance...

Even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. 

Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them. 

Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. 

Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young. 

Live in Johannesburg once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Cape Town once, but leave before it makes you soft. 

Travel. 

Accept certain inalienable truths; prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do, you’ll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. 

Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.

Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85. 

Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth. 

But trust me on the sunscreen… 

Wishing you a very Happy New Year! 

Looking forward to sharing more Frills and Thrills with you in 2011. 

Happy Holidays

The weekend holiday is here, with high spirits and a festive atmosphere all around. 

This is a great time for each of us to spread the happiness by engaging in some good deeds. Your acts of kindness and compassion will add a spot of sunshine to someones day and inspire others to do the same. Don't worry, you don't have to donate your entire xmas bonus to charity, being benevolent doesn't cost a thing. The greatest reward is seeing how your positivity reflects upon others. 

Sprinkle some fairy dust this holiday with these altruistic ideas:

1. Be courteous to other drivers on the road.


2. Instead of being plugged into your phone, laptop or iPod, spend that quality time with family and loved ones. “Time is free, but it's priceless. You can't own it, but you can use it. You can't keep it, but you can spend it. Once you've lost it you can never get it back.” Harvey MacKay


3. Hold the door open for the person behind you, especially if they are carrying packages, bags or babies.


4. Thank people that provide a service to you; waiters, cleaners, cashiers, etc. Remember that they have to work while the rest of us enjoy the public holiday.


5. Offer to housesit for friends or family that are going away on vacation. They will have peace of mind knowing that you're there.


6. Thank your mum or gran for the wonderful meal they prepared. They need to know that they are appreciated.


7. Help someone who is lost and looking for directions.


8. Offer to babysit for friends so that they can have the night off. They will be very grateful.


9. Give out at least 5 compliments per day. Everyone needs some positive reinforcement.


10. Smile, it is the simplest act of kindness. "All the statistics in the world can't measure the warmth of a smile." Chris Hart

Wishing you a lovely long weekend!